Reconstructing My Faith: Postmodernity, Bullies, and Uncle Carl

Well, you knew we'd eventually get to Mark Driscoll if we started talking about deconstructing and reconstructing my faith, right?

[insert heavy sigh here]

Postmodernity

In the spring of 1997, I attended the GenX church planting conference at Mount Hermon (a Christian retreat center in California). One of the speakers there was Mark Driscoll, who spoke passionately about the collapse of modernity, the rise of post-modernity, and how both of those would likely affect the way leaders taught & led their church communities. At the time, I reacted pretty positively to Mark's "in your face" style of speaking.  (For more personal context on my experience at the conference, you can see my post from 2006 entitled 9 Years Ago.)

What I didn't internalize back in 1997 was that Mark Driscoll had only been leading a church for a year or so. Mars Hill Church (Seattle) was growing rapidly, but he was relatively new to church leadership. His forcefulness, his charisma, his passion, and his humor masked his inexperience... and his tendency towards autocratic leadership.

Gosh, guys, I love what I’m doing. I got charged by a demon-possessed guy in my pulpit, the night we launched I had to exit counsel one of my key leaders, 10 minutes before the sermon, I kicked him out of the church. My worship team left three months ago. We moved six miles in the first three months, and it is… I love it. (quote from that message) 

In fairness, lots of the folks involved in the GenX church movement were pretty young... including me. (I was 33 years old in 1997 - man, that seems like a long time ago.) But you can still hear the echoes in that quote of the "pile of dead bodies" attitude that would overtake Mark D. and Mars Hill in the years ahead. 

There is a pile of dead bodies behind the Mars Hill bus, and by God’s grace it’ll be a mountain by the time we’re done. You either get on the bus or you get run over by the bus. Those are the options. But the bus ain’t gonna stop. This is what we’re doing. (quote from Church Planters Boot Camp, Oct. 2007)

With 29 years of life since that gathering at Mount Hermon, I find myself questioning how completely modernity has collapsed while facing pretty clear evidence that post-modernity has become a bigger & bigger part of our cultural conversations. Mostly I see a mish-mash - a sometimes toxic stew - of beliefs and theories about how the world works (or should work) that borrow from both strains of philosophical thought.

And I struggle with the support I gave Mark Driscoll's teaching & writing. What was it about Mark, about myself (also Mark - heh), that drew me in and convinced me to ignore red flags?

I have some thoughts - but, per the usual here on the akapastorguy blog, that's going to require me to tell you some stories.

Story #1: Bullies

I'd experienced bullying off and on in elementary school and junior high... but it kicked into high gear as a high school freshman. I was a small and not very strong guy with glasses - and an invisible target painted on my back. I particularly hated P.E. class and the whole "locker room antics" where weaker folks (like me) became targets for bigger guys trying to prove just how macho they were. (Looking back at this, I realize that those behaviors were more than "I'm big & dumb & mean" - that those guys had their own aches, pains, fears, and wounds that they were struggling with - but at the time they were simply dangerous people I tried to avoid.)

I had basically two strategies to dissuade bullies:

1. invisibility - try to do as little as possible to attract their attention
2. stiff upper lip - no matter what they did, maintain a stoic face (no crying, no complaining, no taunting, no reaction)

But my salvation from being bullied came not from my strategies - instead, it was a friendship with a much larger acquaintance who firmly noted that I was his friend and he didn't want anyone to mess with me. (God bless you, Tony V.)

Story #2: Uncle Carl

My Uncle Carl was actually my great-uncle Carl... he and my Aunt Beulah married late in life and I only met him once (I think) at about age 5.

I don't remember much about him - if it wasn't for family pictures of him with Aunt Beulah, I probably wouldn't even recognize him. But what I do remember was that he was a tremendously skilled amateur magician who specialized in close-up magic. (Close-up magic is sleight of hand tricks - cards, coins, silks, etc. - performed in tight proximity to your audience.) The wonder of seeing those tricks happen, of things appearing and disappearing, of his tremendous command of fan decks to make beautiful patterns... that's never left me.

When he passed away, my Aunt Beulah made sure that my dad & I got his magic books and paraphernalia. (Dad quickly confiscated his marked card decks - but I was left with the fan decks, the rope tricks, and a library of books on magic.) What I discovered is that performing magic isn't, well, magic - it takes confidence, a great deal of dexterity, and a lot of practice to make it seem easy and magical.

Point of Information: My Peculiar Media Intake Habits

I'm a news addict who doesn't like news shows - particularly those in the "let's get a bunch of supposedly smart people together to yell at each other" mode. 

I watch a limited amount of YouTube - mostly things like Rodney on Watch It Played (game explanations), WDW tips videos (hats off to DSNY Newscast, Touring Plans, Ear Scouts, and Disney Food Blog), and smatterings of the Holderness Family and Legal Eagle.

I seldom if ever watch sermons (including my own) - as much as I love truth and hearing God's word preached, I'd rather be forced to watch unboxing videos shot without a tripod than suffer through most church services (my current church is an exception, of course).

I read - a lot. A good bit of stuff on the Internet but also actual physical books - either from the local library or my own bookcase. Weirdly enough, most of my online reading is not about spiritual matters - even as I'm currently reading physical copies of two different devotionals, a couple of books (Don't Let Nobody Turn You Around & God, the Science, the Evidence: The Dawn of a Revolution), and have a stack of commentaries sitting at my feet.

Back to the Question At Hand: How Did I Get Drawn In?

This post has been "under construction" for almost two years because answering that question is... complicated. The disconnected stories you just read are my best attempt to give you some context and metaphors for the musings that follow.

• As I already told you, I don't listen to recorded sermons. So my interaction with Mark Driscoll's teaching was filtered simply through what he was writing. That means I got less of the "Chris Rock goes to church" vibe he liked to lay down in preaching & speaking but still all of the Teflon-coated certainty that was part and parcel of his writing about church leadership.
• I've been a summer missionary, a church staff member, a church planter, and a lead pastor of various churches over nearly thirty years. I cannot emphasize enough how much appeal there is to someone telling you "this is the way to do this" and "it's OK to be taking flak - that means you're over the target". Because the two things that are common to all of those ministry positions are (1) not feeling confident about what you're doing and (2) taking flak (criticism, hostility, attempts to fire you from your ministry position, etc.).
• For a kid who was bullied, congregational church ministry can feel an awfully lot like you were just magically transported back to junior high. I never experienced the physical intimidation I had as a teenager when I was serving a church, but emotional and spiritual bullying were par for the course. 
• For a minister who was bullied, Dricoll's "damn the torpedoes" attitude toward opposition was incredibly attractive. It wasn't that I wanted to be Mark Driscoll - I could sense the potential problems in leaning into that persona - it was that I liked hearing about someone standing up to the bullies.
• Here's the problem inherent in that: Mark Driscoll is, at best, an unreliable narrator of his own story. 
• For a very deep dive into the Mars Hill story (and, by extension, the ministry journey of Mark Driscoll), the podcast series The Rise & Fall of Mars Hill from Christianity Today is excellent.
• I wanted certainty - the bedrock assurance that I was doing the right thing and that my position as a pastor/church leader put me on the side of rightness and goodness. In exchange, I was willing to gloss over elements of Mark's message that were disturbing or problematic.
• I also wanted desperately to be able to do magic (grow a church, see people cross the line of faith, etc.)... ignoring that no single pastor has ever grown a healthy congregation. It takes not just personal confidence but the confidence of a group of believers in the presence and power of Christ. It requires flexibility to react to the moment rather than simply putting a plan in motion and running the bus over anyone who won't get onboard. And it's a marathon, not a sprint - a "long obedience in the same direction".
• Interesting aside: I first came upon long obedience in the same direction as a title of a Eugene Peterson book on the Psalms... but Peterson borrowed the quote from Friedrich Nietzsche.

And Then I Woke Up

I don't specifically remember what caused me to push Mark's books aside - it was probably the plagiarism scandal. Any residual goodwill was crushed by the choices that followed the death of Mars Hill Church. 

I'm not really sure how to end this wandering post. I've tried three or four different ways to approach it and all of them end with too much finger-pointing at broken people and too little self-examination on my own part. In the case of Mark Driscoll, that seems really easy for me to do. 

For me, the important thing wasn't to stop listening to Mark Driscoll - though that certainly wasn't a bad idea. The key was to start listening to what was bubbling out of my heart & mind that would cause me to ignore and/or excuse unhealthy and unChristlike teaching because it "felt good". 

And that's bigger than getting rid of books by "the cussing pastor".

This is the ninth post in a series... if you'd like to read the first eight, here they are:

#1: Reconstructing My Faith: Rocks, Dross, and Almonds

#2: Reconstructing My Faith: Syndrome, Mars, and the "F" Word

#3: Reconstructing My Faith: Cheaters, Ice, and Déjà vu

#4: Reconstructing My Faith: Flywheels, Smokescreens, and The Medicine

#5: Reconstructing My Faith: John Wayne, Straight Lines, and the Benefits of Being a Nerd

#6: Reconstructing My Faith: Pedigrees, Car Crashes, and Saying Goodbye

#7: Reconstructing My Faith: Worst. Church. Service. Ever.
#8: Reconstructing My Faith: A Question, The Rapture, And Dreaming of Escape

aka preaching archive (January 2026)

As some of my long-time readers know, I spent nearly 15 years as a church planter & pastor (after 13+ years in youth ministry)... which came to end in early 2013. (You can read more about that on my posts aka former pastor guy and Kenny Rogers, Toffee, and a Hatmaker.)

For nearly ten years, I didn't preach. (That's not entirely true - I officiated at funeral services for friends and former congregation members - but I didn't deliver the message for a Sunday morning service.) 

In March of 2023, that changed - thanks to the leadership and encouragement of Aarron Schwartz and our church family at Restoration Church Nashville. It's been humbling and wonderful and a bit scary to be back "in the pulpit" (even if we don't actually use a pulpit). The Restoration Church family has been so supportive. (A special shout-out to Bethany and the worship team... it's a privilege to speak after they've helped us prepare our hearts and minds.)

I need to also say "thank you" to a number of folks who encouraged me to take Aarron up on his offer to be part of the preaching rotation - including my wife (Shari Jo), my sons (Braeden & Collin), and even some of the folks I know through my "day job" (thank you, Teri & Denette.)

I decided that I needed to pull those messages into a single place... so that's what this post is for. I'll update it as needed. I'm putting the time stamp for the start of the message - but you're missing out if you don't get the worship team as well.

January 11, 2026 - Joshua 3 & 4 - Upstream Faith

• message starts at the 31 minute mark
• the video quality is not as good due to WiFi issues at the church (the A/V team had to use the old system in order to stream the service)
• "Now faith is the assurance (title deed, confirmation) of things hoped for (divinely guaranteed), and the evidence of things not seen [the conviction of their reality—faith comprehends as fact what cannot be experienced by the physical senses]." (Hebrews 11:1 AMP)
• Managed to name-check Disney parks, Star Wars, and my Romantic poets professor at Baylor in the process of telling Joshua's story.

February 23, 2025 - 2nd Samuel 6 - When The Ark Comes to Town...

• message starts at the 40 minute mark
• I left out another 80s reference from my notes to the 1984 film "Footloose"
• Eugene Peterson quote from his book, Leap Over A Wall

God will not be put and kept in a box, whether the box is constructed of crafted wood or hewn stone or brilliant ideas or fine feelings. We don't take care of God; God takes care of us.

September 1, 2024 - Exodus 35 - More Capable Than You Realize

• message starts at the 35 minute mark
• "Sing to him a new song; play skillfully, and shout for joy." (Psalm 33:3 NIV)
• C.S. Lewis quote I use is from his classic book Mere Christianity

Every faculty you have, your power of thinking or of moving your limbs from moment to moment, is given you by God. If you devoted every moment of your whole life exclusively to His service you could not give Him anything that was not in a sense His own already. So that when we talk of a man doing anything for God or giving anything to God, I will tell you what it is really like.

It is like a small child going to its father and saying, "Daddy, give me sixpence to buy you a birthday present." Of course, the father does, and he is pleased with the child's present. It is all very nice and proper, but only an idiot would think that the father is sixpence to the good on the transaction. 

May 5, 2024 - Luke 22:31-38 - When You Turn Back

• message starts at 31 minute mark
• book I reference: Saving the Bible From Ourselves
• "I have prayed [especially] for you [Peter], that your faith [and confidence in Me] may not fail; and you, once you have turned back again [to Me], strengthen and support your brothers [in the faith].” (Luke 22:32 AMP)

March 17, 2024 - Luke 20:27-40 - Jesus & the Theobros

• message starts at the 38:30 minute mark
• balloon illustration is borrowed from N.T. Wright's Luke for Everyone
• Yeah, I somehow managed to combine Narnia, levirate marriage, and Admiral Ackbar into the message.

September 24, 2023 - Luke 14:25-35 - Counting the Cost

• message starts at the 38:30 minute mark
• my personal notes call this message "The Symphony Bar"
• “Simply put, if you’re not willing to take what is dearest to you, whether plans or people, and kiss it good-bye, you can’t be my disciple.” (Luke 14:33 MSG)

March 26, 2023 - Luke 8:22-25 - Master of the Storm

• message starts at the 33 minute mark
• The message here is NOT “Jesus will calm all the storms in your life”… it is “Jesus will not leave you alone in the boat”.
• "If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast." (Psalm 139:9-10 NIV)

Classic: Card Games & Paint Splatters

By now, pretty much everyone who reads this blog is aware that I'm somewhat obsessed with my hobby, collecting & playing board games. (Those of you who've seen the game room are sniggering at my use of the word "somewhat" in the previous sentence - stop it.) One part of my enjoyment of the hobby is online conversations about board games with other folks who share my enthusiasm.

One of those conversations seventeen years ago took a very interesting turn. We had been talking about a new "take that" card game (one of the best known "take that" games is Mille Bornes) which has weak gameplay & even weaker card art. That got some folks wondering about the ugliest card art they'd ever seen... which then led someone to bring the cliché that "beauty is in the eye of the beholder". And then I felt compelled to tell my story:

I'm reminded of our visit to the Art Institute in Chicago... after hours of perusing art by Seurat, Rembrandt, Cézanne, Van Gogh and others, we found ourselves in the lower reaches of the Institute, in the "Contemporary" section. 

After looking rather askew at a Jackson Pollock (I understand intellectually that I'm looking at something "fraught w/meaning", but it still looks like paint spatter to me), we turned to see a small African-American woman in a guard's uniform standing beside. 

"I painted that," she said... and smiled. 

My wife & I laughed and turned to look at an abstract nude of an obviously overweight woman to our left. 

"That's my mother-in-law," she said. 

I don't think I ever appreciated art quite as much as I did that afternoon.

Matthew Frederick responded:

One afternoon at the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York, after having spent a week straight touring the city with my daughter, I plopped down exhausted on a bench to wait for her to finish with something and come find me.
I'd felt exactly as you do about Pollock, that it was just paint splatters, and that though in theory I should see something or be moved, there just wasn't anything there for me. Turns out I was sitting across from a huge Pollock, but I pretty much ignored it. Suddenly, though, WHAM, I could see it. Motion, and flow, and depth. The painting was simply stunning. My brain had finally worked it out. 

To this day I can immediately find depth in Pollock paintings, but my brain's never quite worked out improvised jazz. Similar to the Pollock, I know it's a matter of my brain "getting it," and perhaps someday it will. I'll never forget my sudden awakening to the painting style, though, and the realization that there are some things that I just don't get yet, but that doesn't mean there's nothing there.
(Not saying that you're saying there's not... just a memory and an observation.)

To which I responded:

Actually, Matthew, you've just given me one of the best sermon/message illustrations ever. That's the way I feel when I try to explain the grace of Jesus Christ to someone - like I'm talking & talking and they're looking at me like I'm trying to describe a Jackson Pollock painting. 

And then there's that moment when they "get it"... sweet.

With some more time to think about it, I've come to a trio of interesting conclusions about art & faith:

1. I think we feel like it's our "Christian duty" to be able to explain everything there is to know about an infinite God... it's this impulse that leads televangelists to claim to know why God allowed 9/11 or a Christian friend to jump quickly to "they're better off in heaven" to a grieving friend. Since we can see, as Matthew put it, the "motion & flow & depth" of a life that orbits around Jesus, we want desperately for other people to see it, too.
2. According to the Bible, our primary obligation is to live a life of "motion, flow & depth" - to do what Jesus did. (Romans 8:29) We should be "prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have" (1 Peter 3:15), but that verse doesn't imply that we should explain the ways of God. Our responsibility is to tell our own story... (BTW, explaining the ways of God is gonna be pretty darn difficult when the Bible claims that "his ways are higher than our ways" (Isaiah 55:9).)
3. Finally, notice how Matthew ended up in front of the Jackson Pollock painting. He wasn't planning to be there - but someone (the curator) had placed a bench where he could take his time to soak it in. Another part of our job as followers of Christ is to metaphorically put up paintings & place benches so that people can have the opportunity to examine Jesus... the chance to have one of those moments where the "motion, flow & depth" becomes clear... a moment where they can clearly experience the grace of God. Our churches need to be that kind of place - where people weary from life can come in, sit down & see what it looks like when people in love with Jesus give themselves to Him 100%

This article was adapted from an article originally published in the 7/26/07 edition of the Grapevine, the newsletter of NewLife Community Church.

aka preaching archive

As some of my long-time readers know, I spent nearly 15 years as a church planter & pastor (after 13+ years in youth ministry)... which came to end in early 2013. (You can read more about that on my posts aka former pastor guy and Kenny Rogers, Toffee, and a Hatmaker.)

For nearly ten years, I didn't preach. (That's not entirely true - I officiated at funeral services for friends and former congregation members - but I didn't deliver the message for a Sunday morning service.) 

Last year, that changed - thanks to the leadership and encouragement of Aarron Schwartz and our church family at Restoration Church Nashville. It's been humbling and wonderful and a bit scary to be back "in the pulpit" (even if we don't actually use a pulpit). The Restoration Church family has been so supportive. (A special shout-out to Bethany and the worship team... it's a privilege to speak after they've helped us prepare our hearts and minds.)

I need to also say "thank you" to a number of folks who encouraged me to take Aarron up on his offer to be part of the preaching rotation - including my wife (Shari Jo), my sons (Braeden & Collin), and even some of the folks I know through my "day job" (thank you, Terri & Denette.)

I decided that I needed to pull those messages into a single place... so that's what this post is for. I'll update it as needed. I'm putting the time stamp for the start of the message - but you're missing out if you don't get the worship team as well.

February 23, 2025 - 2nd Samuel 6 - When The Ark Comes to Town...

• message starts at the 40 minute mark
• I left out another 80s reference from my notes to the 1984 film "Footloose"
• Eugene Peterson quote from his book, Leap Over A Wall

God will not be put and kept in a box, whether the box is constructed of crafted wood or hewn stone or brilliant ideas or fine feelings. We don't take care of God; God takes care of us.

September 1, 2024 - Exodus 35 - More Capable Than You Realize

• message starts at the 35 minute mark
• "Sing to him a new song; play skillfully, and shout for joy." (Psalm 33:3 NIV)
• C.S. Lewis quote I use is from his classic book Mere Christianity

Every faculty you have, your power of thinking or of moving your limbs from moment to moment, is given you by God. If you devoted every moment of your whole life exclusively to His service you could not give Him anything that was not in a sense His own already. So that when we talk of a man doing anything for God or giving anything to God, I will tell you what it is really like.

It is like a small child going to its father and saying, "Daddy, give me sixpence to buy you a birthday present." Of course, the father does, and he is pleased with the child's present. It is all very nice and proper, but only an idiot would think that the father is sixpence to the good on the transaction. 

May 5, 2024 - Luke 22:31-38 - When You Turn Back

• message starts at 31 minute mark
• book I reference: Saving the Bible From Ourselves
• "I have prayed [especially] for you [Peter], that your faith [and confidence in Me] may not fail; and you, once you have turned back again [to Me], strengthen and support your brothers [in the faith].” (Luke 22:32 AMP)

March 17, 2024 - Luke 20:27-40 - Jesus & the Theobros

• message starts at the 38:30 minute mark
• balloon illustration is borrowed from N.T. Wright's Luke for Everyone
• Yeah, I somehow managed to combine Narnia, levirate marriage, and Admiral Ackbar into the message.

September 24, 2023 - Luke 14:25-35 - Counting the Cost

• message starts at the 38:30 minute mark
• my personal notes call this message "The Symphony Bar"
• “Simply put, if you’re not willing to take what is dearest to you, whether plans or people, and kiss it good-bye, you can’t be my disciple.” (Luke 14:33 MSG)

March 26, 2023 - Luke 8:22-25 - Master of the Storm

• message starts at the 33 minute mark
• The message here is NOT “Jesus will calm all the storms in your life”… it is “Jesus will not leave you alone in the boat”.
• "If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast." (Psalm 139:9-10 NIV)
  

Reconstructing My Faith: A Question, The Rapture, And Dreaming of Escape

A Question

Back in 2006, I had a very strange pastoral day - which, if you'll ask any pastor, is kind of a regular feature of the job.

A lady who attended another church in town stopped by my office & asked me for help. She apologized for bothering me when I was busy... but wanted to know if I could give her a "real short explanation of the book of Revelation." Hmmm....

 

I managed to keep the answer down to 5 minutes, which definitely isn't time for much in the way of detail:

• letters to churches (chapters 1-3)
• things are gonna get worse before they better... and everybody & his brother has an opinion on how that's going to work - some are more detailed (read: specific charts, timelines & battle plans) than others... and I'm one of those "less details, more big picture" kind of guys when it comes to this subject (chapters 4-19)
• things will get better (chapters 20-22)

For those wondering - yes, I'm still unclear why she came to me rather than her own pastor (who was/is a great guy.)

Then Shari came home and said she had been hearing ads on one of our local Christian radio stations for a service that will e-mail your pagan friends who are not raptured when the rapture comes. I googled and found www.youvebeenleftbehind.com (the site is thankfully dead now). Seriously, that was the name of it. (I figure Larry Norman was spinning in his grave at someone profiting off his song in such a cheeseball way.)  

 

My reaction: "If we love people who don't follow Jesus so darn much, why not do something about it now rather than spamming them from heaven?"

The Rapture

A few years later, as the Harold Camping end of the world nonsense metastasized, I found myself looking more carefully at my own history and the theological assumptions I'd grown up with. (Note: I don't want to get into the details of Camping's prediction - they're the usual mess of numerology, Scripture-twisting & outright nonsense... which, when they failed, caused him to talk about the "spiritual" end of the world... and then finally to admit that he was flat out wrong.)

As I've noted before, I grew up in Southern California in the 1970s, back when it was one of the great gathering places for Jesus Movement folks - Calvary Chapel was king & Chuck Smith (their pastor) was a gifted speaker who spent a lot of time on the sure return of Jesus Christ. One of the guys who led my youth group Bible study was an ex-hippie who came to Jesus & was a big part of a "Jesus Music" band - and he was also very into teaching & talking about the End Times.

You see, evangelical culture was flooded with books (The Late Great Planet Earth was the most notable), films (I still run into people who were profoundly influenced and/or scared by "Thief in the Night"), and music (Larry Norman's "I Wish We'd All Been Ready" was popular - long before DC Talk covered the tune or LaHaye & Jenkins ripped off a line to title their fiction series) about the Rapture.

Remember, it was the 1970s: Watergate, the fallout from the Sexual Revolution, the loss of the Vietnam War, the energy crisis - complete with gas rationing, the 1973 Arab-Israeli War, etc. It was pretty easy to convince folks that life was getting worse & a one-way ticket out of here was an incredibly desirable thing - esp. if the destination was eternity with God.

Notice that the fervor for this kind of thing began to ebb as circumstances got better - reaching a real low point for the End Times business when the perennial favorite for the "Who is Gog & Magog?" contest (see Revelation 20) - the Soviet Union - went belly up in 1989.

But the flames were fanned again with the release of the "Left Behind" book series... and movies... and young adult book series... and one begins to wonder whether the primary motivation is theological or financial. (My personal critique of the Left Behind series? In short: "badly written dialogue, cardboard cut-out characters in an interesting plot... but undercut by the need to shoehorn in the author's very detailed premillenial dispensationalist view of Bible prophecy.")

Of course, there's been a long history of prophecies (check out the website A Brief History of the Apocalypse for that long, sad lineage) about the end of the world, both inside & outside Christianity... 

OK, enough history. With that particular theological context growing up, I'd always just assumed that the Chick Tract/Left Behind/Thief in the Night storyline was the only or best way to interpret the Scriptures.

But with some research, I kept running into the inescapable fact that the "doctrine" of the Rapture (as we know it) pretty much started in the 19th century with the teachings of John Darby (pretty much the father of dispensational theology) & C.I. Scofield (who published the Scofield Chain Reference Bible, which put Darby's theology on the same page as the Scriptures in the form of footnotes). So, the Rapture is a theological belief that's a little more than 150 years old.

New isn't necessarily bad... but when it comes to theology, it's always possible that something "new" simply means folks pulled stuff out of context to come up with their belief system... so I found myself struggling with what I believe about the Rapture - but, then again, I've always struggled with what I believe about the End Times. Not about the sure return of Christ or that God will reign... but with the nitty-gritty details of what will happen when and the tendency of some believers to want a "map" of how it's all gonna go down.

Am I saying there won't be a Rapture? No. Is it possible that the return of Christ (the Second Coming) and the Rapture will occur at the same time? Yes. Do I know this for sure? Absolutely not.

Here's my two cents - this particular issue (the Rapture) can NOT be one of those theological hills that we chose to fight to the death for... the divinity of Christ, the truth of the Resurrection, the inspired nature of Scripture - yes, these fundamental beliefs are worth everything we have.

But a particular brand of End Times theology is not worth our time & energy. Since we acknowledge that "no man knows the day or the hour" (Matthew 24:36) and that appearance of the Lord will be "like a thief in the night" (1st Thessalonians 5:2), we do a horrendous disservice to those in need of Jesus' saving grace by focusing inordinate amounts of attention & emotion on fighting with each other over signs & interpretations.

You & I may not agree completely on what will happen at the end of time - but I once again would suggest that our call to evangelize & disciple, to serve & minister in the name of Christ is substantially more important than convincing someone of our particular eschatology.

The Escape Hatch

Let me be clear - all of the "reconstructing" I wrote about concerning the Rapture & the End Times occurred 12+ years ago. So what does that have to do with my faith right now?

Well, I've come to the realization that I am always looking for ways to cope with the struggles of life... and the current chaos of our political and cultural climate makes an escape hatch particularly tempting. Like I wrote back in the day, the Rapture looks like a pretty good theological idea when you think the world is in free fall.

.

Douglas Rushkoff wrote (in his book, Get Back in the Box) that:

In extreme cases, like fundamentalist religious or political stories, the chaos of any given moment becomes an indication of some great impending apocalypse when justice will be done. I've seen cheeky bumper stickers that read: "In case of rapture, this car will be empty." The passengers are literally looking forward to that scenario. When we are addicted to stories with endings, we'd prefer Armageddon to no ending at all.

I think, at some level, that's what is happening to many evangelical followers of Christ right now - seduced by fear-mongering news sources and fueled by those claiming to speak for God, they are tempted to buy into a persecution narrative that leads inexorably to excusing, minimizing, and/or even participating in things like this...

...or pictures like this (life-sized sticker of the current president hogtied in the back of a pickup truck) being posted by a presidential candidate:

Political fervor and tribalism has become an escape hatch... a way to run away from the difficulties of a multicultural society full of people who desperately need the love of Christ. Rather than obeying the Biblical commands to "conduct yourself with wisdom in your interactions with outsiders (non-believers), make the most of each opportunity [treating it as something precious]" (Colossians 4:5 AMP) and to "always be ready to offer a defense, humbly and respectfully, when someone asks why you live in hope" (1 Peter 3:15 VOICE), the tendency is to lean into sloganeering, idolatry, and raw abuse of power.

There's a temptation - documented by Russell Moore in conversations with pastors - to give up on the words & example of Jesus and instead invest your time, talents, and treasure in uplifting a strong man to fight for you and/or choose to focus on fighting yourself.

It was the result of having multiple pastors tell me, essentially, the same story about quoting the Sermon on the Mount, parenthetically, in their preaching — "turn the other cheek" — [and] to have someone come up after to say, "Where did you get those liberal talking points?" And what was alarming to me is that in most of these scenarios, when the pastor would say, "I'm literally quoting Jesus Christ," the response would not be, "I apologize." The response would be, "Yes, but that doesn't work anymore. That's weak." And when we get to the point where the teachings of Jesus himself are seen as subversive to us, then we're in a crisis.

 I'll note that (as David French so aptly put it) "one doesn’t comply with the command to “love your enemies” by hiring someone to hate them for you."

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Relentless cynicism and disengagement can be an escape hatch as well - especially for those of us tempted to disassociate ourselves from theological and political viewpoints we find repugnant. It's all too easy to bury our heads in the sand, to stay silent in the face of subtle (and sometimes not-so-subtle) pressure to hunker down and "stop rockin' the boat." This could be about politics, theology, ethics, or simply evidencing the fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23 AMP):

But the fruit of the Spirit [the result of His presence within us] is love [unselfish concern for others], joy, [inner] peace, patience [not the ability to wait, but how we act while waiting], kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such things there is no law.

Thinking about the gnawing desire to disengage from the world around me, I was reminded of the lyrics of Steve Taylor's "Since I Gave Up Hope, I Feel A Lot Better":

Life unwinds like a cheap sweater

But since I gave up hope I feel a lot better

And the truth gets blurred like a wet letter

But since I gave up hope I feel a lot better

While the world winds down to a final prayer

Nothing soothes quicker than complete despair

I predict by dinner I won't even care

Since I gave up hope I feel a lot better

And this cartoon by Dan Pegoda:

I feel this temptation in my bones - and I'm thankful for the examples of folks like David French & Russell Moore who haven't given up and/or given in to bitterness. 

Moreover, I find myself clinging to the words of  Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn:

Let your credo be this: Let the lie come into the world, let it even triumph. But not through me.

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Our desire for escape from the stresses and fears of this world - whether into tribal politics, cynical detachment, accumulation of possessions and power, or hedonistic indulgence - is so much less than what God intends for us. Erwin McManus (in his book, Chasing Daylight) says it well:

Our pop theology has eliminated the place for risk and insulated us with a comfort-and-security theology. This view runs counter to what is found in the Scriptures. I want to reiterate the fact that the center of God’s will is not a safe place, but the most dangerous place in the world. God fears nothing and no one. God moves with intentionality and power. To live outside God’s will puts us in danger, but to live in His will makes us dangerous.

Mike Yaconelli wrote something similar in his book, Dangerous Wonder:

I want a lifetime of holy moments. Every day I want to be in dangerous proximity to Jesus. I long for a life that explodes with meaning and is filled with adventure, wonder, risk, and danger. I long for a faith that is gloriously treacherous. I want to be with Jesus, not knowing whether to cry or laugh.

Those both sound a lot better than longing for an escape hatch - even couched in spiritual language and Biblical imagery.

This is the eighth post in a series... if you'd like to read the first seven, here they are:

#1: Reconstructing My Faith: Rocks, Dross, and Almonds

#2: Reconstructing My Faith: Syndrome, Mars, and the "F" Word

#3: Reconstructing My Faith: Cheaters, Ice, and Déjà vu

#4: Reconstructing My Faith: Flywheels, Smokescreens, and The Medicine

#5: Reconstructing My Faith: John Wayne, Straight Lines, and the Benefits of Being a Nerd

#6: Reconstructing My Faith: Pedigrees, Car Crashes, and Saying Goodbye
#7: Reconstructing My Faith: Worst. Church. Service. Ever.

Manhandling the Word of Truth

To be accurate, the former president is not selling Bibles - he's simply licensing his name & image through the same company (CIC Ventures LLC) that licensed Trump Trading Cards & his Never Surrender High-Top Sneaker to a company selling a King James Version of the Bible with an American flag embossed on the cover and the texts of foundational U.S. government documents included.

Because nothing says "God so loved the world" (John 3:16) like branding Scripture with American symbols and documents. Note: "CIC Ventures, though, is a conduit to Trump — personally, if not politically. In his financial disclosure released last year, he’s identified as the company’s “manager, president, secretary and treasurer” and the Donald J. Trump Revocable Trust is identified as a 100 percent owner of the business. The same entity also receives royalties from his book “A MAGA Journey” and speaking engagements. A person familiar with the agreement confirmed to the New York Times that Trump earns royalties from purchases." (Source: Washington Post)

----- I've written about politicians and accurately handling the word of truth before:

• former vice-president Mike Pence - ""So let’s run the race marked out for us. Let’s fix our eyes on Old Glory and all she represents."
• President Joe Biden - "The American military has been answering for a long time. “Here I am, Lord. Send me. Here I am, send me.”"
• Governor Ron DeSantis - "Put on the full armor of God. Stand firm against the left’s schemes. You will face flaming arrows, but if you have the shield of faith, you will overcome them, and in Florida we walk the line here."

Suffice it to say that I get the need to use rhetorical flourish and echo classic passages of literature to evoke emotion. But we as followers of Christ are called to "be diligent to present yourself approved to God as a workman who does not need to be ashamed, accurately handling the word of truth." (2 Timothy 2:15, NASB). The things Mike Pence & Joe Biden & Ron DeSantis said was not accurately handling Scripture.

What the former President has done and is doing makes them look like amateurs at the abuse of God's Word.

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Mr. Trump has a spotted history when it comes to both hucksterism and the use/abuse of the Bible as a prop. He's managed to brand and/or sell almost anything that isn't nailed down - some highlights include Trump Steaks, Trump University, Trump Vodka, and Trump: The Game. If you want to see more, the Wikipedia article on the Trump Organization has a very long list.

As for his use of Scripture...

• 
  "Two Corinthians" (which he blamed Tony Perkins for... who in return noted that "It shows that he’s not familiar with Bible.")
• Signing Bibles... and other things (just read the article... which, even from Fox News, does manage to cover the outrage pretty well even as they indulge in a bit of whataboutism) 
• posing with a Bible (thanks to a suggestion from his daughter) in front of St. John's Church - minutes after protestors had been forcibly cleared from the street with tear gas and pepper balls
• And, yes, I'm aware that there is conflicting reports about the orders to clear Lafayette Square that night of protestors responding to the death of George Floyd... but it was still a photo op with a Bible as a prop.

This newest grift - endorsing Lee Greenwood's God Bless The USA Bible - is sadly par for the course.

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The reaction to the release of Trump's endorsement during Holy Week provoked a - shall we say? - strong reaction.

The former president once claimed that "Nobody has done more for Christianity or for evangelicals or for religion itself than I have..." - but if memes like the ones shared above are any indicator, the main thing he's accomplished is to drive people away from faith.

The frustration isn't simply limited to The Daily Show and meme-happy Facebook friends... it extends to devoted followers of Christ as well.

I found it equally sobering to think about what a grift like this does to further erode the moral sense of those who've chosen to follow the former president.

...Clips like the one above make a certain sort of shrewd strategic sense.

That seems counterintuitive since many Christians will recoil from it, and Trump can’t afford to alienate Christian voters seven months out from an election. But I suspect that any evangelical who’d hold a little light grifting involving the Holy Bible against him is already long gone, wandering in the Never Trump desert with the likes of David French and Russell Moore.

And Trump is fine with that. His first political priority, even above maximizing his chances of reelection, is purging the Republican Party of anyone who would question his right to rule. He doesn’t want independent-minded Christians in the GOP any more than he wants the traditional conservatives who preferred Nikki Haley in the primary. He’ll win without them—and if he can’t, he’ll at least have consolidated his power over one-half of America’s political establishment in the process.

In that context, whether by design or by happenstance, the “Trump Bible” operates as a sort of litmus test for evangelicals who have stuck with him this far through thick and thin. You won’t abandon me if I make a mockery of your faith, will you? No, of course you won’t.

I see it as an analog to the point he made in 2016 when he boasted that he could shoot someone without losing votes. The reaction of Republican primary voters to the four indictments filed against him last year essentially vindicated that boast; go figure that if they’re willing to indulge him in crimes, he might reasonably assume that they’re willing to indulge him in brazen sacrilege aimed at lining his pockets amid a cash crunch.

It’s a loyalty test, as practically everything in a cult of personality is. He’s testing their faith—in him, not in Christianity. And insofar as those two faiths conflict, he expects them to choose more wisely than the Frenches and Moores of the world have. Those who refuse will find the doorway to exile from the Republican Party that-a-way.

Hawking Bibles emblazoned with an American flag during an election season suggests he’s very confident about how they’ll choose.

I don’t blame him.
Nick Cattagio ("The True Faith" - sadly behind a paywall)

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Christians are under siege but must protect content that is pro-God. We love God, and we have to protect anything that is pro-God. We must defend God in the public square and not allow the media or the Left-wing groups to silence, censor, or discriminate against us.

(quote from the Trump endorsement of the God Bless The USA Bible)

I need to push back just a little bit against this... I am a Christian and I don't feel particularly "under siege". The same week this video was released (yes, Holy Week), I actually managed to share Scripture multiple times on Facebook. In an online group of friends (both Christian and non-Christian) counting down our favorite albums, I posted music videos from Common Hymnal, Steve Taylor, and Adam Again (all Christian artists) without nary a peep of protest. I drove without being stopped or hassled to church twice - once on Good Friday and again on Easter Sunday. In both of those services, the truth of Christ's crucifixion and resurrection were clearly taught and sung about. Here in my office where I'm typing this, I count eight Bibles and multiple commentaries in my line of vision.

I have not been silenced, censored, or discriminated against for my faith - well, except when the things I believed were true to Scripture and the character of Christ were attacked and undercut by [checks notes] other Christians.

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I wanted to come up with something wise and convicting to close this post with... I wanted to turn on my "pastor mojo" and finish with marching orders to my fellow followers of Christ.

But I'm tired. So tired of watching Biblical truth (and physical Bibles themselves) being used as props... by both political parties.

So, I once again leave you with this.

Pray always. Pray in the Spirit. Pray about everything in every way you know how! And keeping all this in mind, pray on behalf of God’s people. Keep on praying feverishly, and be on the lookout until evil has been stayed.

Ephesians 6:18 (VOICE)

The Lawyer, The King, And The Would-Be President

The Lawyer 

Turns out, the two "heroes" of the Southern Baptist 'Conservative Resurgence' were: 

1. a tone-deaf autocrat who specialized in using DARVO (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim & Offender) to bully sexual assault victims and protect his friends & proteges
2. a deeply cynical lawyer who used his position of power to actively groom and sexually assault young men over decades 

It's become clear that not only was Paul Pressler (the lawyer) passed over for a presidential ethics commission due to "undisclosed issues" but that the law firm and lawyer who handled all of the Executive Committee of the Southern Baptist Convention business for years knew that discovery in a civil suit would reveal sordid details about Pressler and his abuse of young men. The lawsuit was settled late last year... because it became obvious that all of this would spill out into open court.

I have spent the last month sick at my stomach - my heart and mind churning at how I defended the institution of the SBC for years, believing that by fighting from the inside for Christ-like behavior and fidelity to our stated mission to share the love of Jesus Christ that it would make a difference. 

I know that there are many people of goodwill and great faith in SBC congregations... I've been privileged to lead and be led by them. I am deeply thankful for the education I received at Baptist institutions (Baylor and Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary) and the mentoring I had from faithful Baptist leaders. And I am convinced that the majority of my faithful mentors would be horrified and angered by this wholesale betrayal of the Christian faith by the leadership of the denomination.

But, frankly, I'm exhausted by the drumbeat of scandals, coverups, and insipid excuses. (The recent stupidity of SBC entities filing amicus briefs against an abuse victim in Kentucky is both a public relations disaster and a clear indicator that protection of the institutions is more important than truth or justice.)

The King

I am deeply wearied by arguments like "God uses broken vessels" and "look at King David". In fact, let's look at King David and the havoc his sexual assault of Bathsheba wrought in his life and hers.

• summoned Bathsheba to rape her
• was responsible for her pregnancy
• got her husband drunk in an attempt to cover up the pregnancy
• ordered Joab to abandon her husband on the battlefield so he would die, thus freeing David to marry his widow
• ignored the rape of his daughter by his son (her half-brother)
• banished the son (Absalom) who murdered the rapist son two years later
• was manipulated multiple times by Joab based on the fallout from the initial decision to take Bathsheba
• brought back Absalom but shunned him for two years
• Absalom undermined David's leadership & led a revolt
• David was forced to flee for his life
• David is betrayed by multiple key leaders
• Joab murders Absalom to end the rebellion
• And then more rebellions happen...

Actions matter. There are consequences. Sinful behavior has a ripple effect in your life and in the lives of those around you. The greater your position of influence, the greater the ripple effect.

So, when the two "heroes" of the Southern Baptist 'Conservative Resurgence' turn out to be unrepentant abusers and enablers, it has a powerful and heart-rending effect on those who are trying to follow Christ.

The Would-Be President

When we move into the current political arena, sinful behavior still has a ripple effect in your life and the lives of those around you. The greater your position of influence, the more profound the effect of your choices and consequences.

The Southern Baptist Convention in 1998 stated this clearly in their Resolution on Moral Character of Public Officials:

"Governing authorities are not themselves exempt from the rule of law and must submit to the nation’s statutes, rather than mocking them (Romans 13:1; 1 Peter 2:14; Proverbs 19:28-29; 2 Samuel 12:7; Mark 6:17-18)...

"Tolerance of serious wrong by leaders sears the conscience of the culture, spawns unrestrained immorality and lawlessness in the society, and surely results in God’s judgment (1 Kings 16:30; Isaiah 5:18-25)...

"We implore our government leaders to live by the highest standards of morality both in their private actions and in their public duties, and thereby serve as models of moral excellence and character...

"We urge all Americans to embrace and act on the conviction that character does count in public office, and to elect those officials and candidates who, although imperfect, demonstrate consistent honesty, moral purity and the highest character."

Instead, evangelicals seem hellbent (pun intended) on pushing forward a candidate for the president who currently is facing 91 felony counts in four different trials as well as three civil trials, two of which so far have saddled him and his companies with nearly 90 million dollars in judgements for being judged liable for doing what he clearly explained to Billy Bush in 2005 that he could do whenever he wanted:

"I better use some Tic Tacs just in case I start kissing her. You know I'm automatically attracted to beautiful—I just start kissing them. It's like a magnet. Just kiss. I don't even wait. And when you're a star, they let you do it. You can do anything. Grab 'em by the p*ssy. You can do anything." 

In 2022, the former president doubled down on this during a deposition for one of his civil trials:

KAPLAN: And you say – and again this has become very famous – in this video, ‘“I just start kissing them. It’s like a magnet. Just kiss. I don’t even wait. And when you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything. Grab them by the p*ssy. You can do anything.” That’s what you said. Correct?

TRUMP: Well, historically, that’s true with stars.

KAPLAN: It’s true with stars that they can grab women by the p*ssy?

TRUMP: Well, that’s what, if you look over the last million years I guess that’s been largely true. Not always, but largely true. Unfortunately or fortunately.

KAPLAN: And you consider yourself to be a star?

TRUMP: I think you can say that. Yeah.

The unbelieving world is watching. We evangelicals don't have sacrifice abuse survivors or Biblical truth on the altars of political power and institutional stability. But it certainly looks like we're going to do it again.

The greatest single cause of atheism in the world today is Christians: who acknowledge Jesus with their lips, walk out the door, and deny Him by their lifestyle. That is what an unbelieving world simply finds unbelievable.

Brennan Manning

We now see young evangelicals walking away from evangelicalism not because they do not believe what the church teaches, but because they believe the church itself does not believe what the church teaches. 

Russell Moore